Archive for the ‘säx’ Category

318

Juni 29, 2020

„You say you wanna

go slower but I wanna

go faster, faster“

[Gasoline from Haim – Women in Music, Pt. III Live]

Having fun with MBV

Februar 16, 2010

Some jokes lifted from this thread:

Starters:

Q. How many My Bloody Valentines does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. One. But he takes 20 years to do it! And everybody stands around and applauds while he’s doing it!

Main dish:

Q: What did Belinda and Kevin drink together before having sex?
A: Strawberry wine. (Strawberry Wine is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Q: What did Kevin say to Belinda when they were making out before sex?
A: „Feed me with your kiss.“ (Feed Me With Your Kiss is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Q: What did Belinda say when she felt Kevin’s erection when they were making out?
A: „I can see it (but I can’t feel it). (I Can See It (But I Can’t Feel It) is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Q: How did Belinda describe herself right before having sex with Kevin?
A: „Emptiness inside.“ (Emptiness Inside is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Q: What did Kevin say when he had sex with Belinda?
A: „Soft as snow (but warm inside).“ (Soft As Snow (But Warm Inside) is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Q: What did Belinda say when she was talking dirty to Kevin during sex?
A: „(Please) lose yourself in me.“ ((Please) Lose Yourself In Me is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Q: What did Kevin say when he was talking dirty to Belinda during sex?
A: „Drive it all over me.“ (Drive It All Over Me is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Q: What did Belinda say when she was getting tired of sex?
A: „Lose my breath.“ (Lose My Breath is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Q: What did Kevin say when Belinda asked when he was going to climax during sex?
A: „Soon.“ (Soon is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Q: What did Belinda say to Kevin right before he climaxed during sex?
A: „Cupid come.“ (Cupid Come is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Q: What did Kevin say to Belinda when he pulled out and climaxed during sex?
A: „Swallow.“ (Swallow is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Q: What did Belinda suggest after sex with Kevin was over?
A: „Cigarette in your bed.“ (Cigarette In Your Bed is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Q: What was Belinda thinking after sex with Kevin?
A: „Never say goodbye.“ (Never Say Goodbye is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Q: What was Kevin thinking after sex with Belinda?
A: „(You’re) safe in your sleep (from this girl).“ ((You’re) Safe In Your Sleep (From This Girl) is a song by My Bloody Valentine!)

Dessert:

Q: How does Kevin Shields keep from going deaf at My Bloody Valentine concerts?

A: Kevin shields his ears!

How to get rid of that f*cking blues

Oktober 6, 2009


One of my standard after hours settings. I lie on our mauve leather couch in the living room and listen to my ipod on shuffle. My job is to rate songs as quickly as possible. 100 songs usually take less than an hour. The main question is: Will it stay or will it go? Suddenly this little blues from the old times comes on. Judging from the sound quality and the hissing it must be from the 1920s or something. Three stars, a keeper, I’d say, just about. After ten seconds I consider moving on to the next title. But what does this woman sing there? Something about making a dead man come without omitting the physical details. Apparently in 1935 – the year this was recorded – the U.S. weren’t quite as Victorian as these days.

Am besten fickt man erst und badet dann (Brecht)

September 4, 2009

Ich höre fern das Plätschern deiner Wasser
Ich fühl das Herz in meine Hode sinken.
Es drängt mich wieder dein Pipi zu trinken,
Weil ich ein ruchlos raffinierter Prasser.
(Friedrich Schlegel)

Es drängt mich, dein Pipi zu trinken,
und sieh, nun trinke ich bereits.
O welch Genuss bei deinem Beinespreiz,
o wie die Wasser hurtig blinken.
(Joachim Ringelnatz)

saviour’s sex

März 28, 2009

William ist von einer Mission beseelt: Er ist überzeugt, dass die Welt in wenigen Stunden untergehen wird – und dass er berufen ist, sie zu retten. Als Einziger hat er die Zeichen erkannt und gedeutet, und jetzt muss er sich beeilen und die überhitzte Welt abkühlen, bevor sie verglüht. Lektürefetzen zur Klimakatastrophe haben sich in seinem Kopf mit diffusen Erlösungsphantasien zu einer bizarren, in sich aber vollkommen schlüssigen Überzeugung verquickt: Die Welt ist in ihm, deshalb kann er sie, indem er sich selbst abkühlt, mitabkühlen. Für diesen Temperatursturz aber muss er ein Opfer bringen, das ihn, ganz wie der Anblick von Geld, mit Sehnsucht und Ekel zugleich erfüllt: Er muss mit jemandem Sex haben.

(Aus einer Besprechung von John Wray’s Retter der Welt (Originaltitel: Lowboy))

.

März 12, 2009

Sie findet, dass ein Bett eher dazu da ist, darin zu schlafen.

.

März 11, 2009

Dann stieß ihm seine Freundin zu Weihnachten wütend den neuen Alessi-Korkenzieher in jenen Körperteil, den seine Kollegen Porsche nennen und den Daniel, wie er selbst es formuliert, schon in vielen Garagen geparkt hat.

(aus einem Verriss von Bodo Kirchhoff’s neuem Buch Erinnerungen an meinen Porsche, wo sich ein Investmentbanker an die guten Zeiten erinnert)